So today...

So today was very long and busy. Well, probably not as busy compared to others' days, but still. I'm exhausted. I visited a friend from middle school I hadn't seen in ages, and I'm so glad I did. She's so amazingly beautiful- WOW. Absotively posilutely gorgeous. I told her that, but she's female, so she doesn't truly believe me. But still. Anyway, she just had her heart wrenched out and stomped on as well, so we had a good time talking. We both came to interesting conclusions about ourselves. For example, we both have a huge fear of unrequited feelings and relationships being one-way (thanks to a certain boy in both our pasts), we both give and give and give- we're both extremely loving and affectionate and are waiting for that someone who will actually like that about us, she had several shallow relationships that she ended to subconsciously contribute to her feeling of control and to increase her self-esteem (which didn't really work), we both think its our fault, by being so loving, that our relationships ended, we both have a fear of appearing too needy or desperate, and thus dig ourselves into deeper holes trying to apologize for it...
We pretty much did nothing but talk, which I did not object to at all. Better than sitting around watching a movie and not catching up.

I've renewed several old friendships, actually. Anjali called me, Nick commented me (that was weird and very random), and my old friend David (not the one from school) and I are emailing again like we did way back when. It's pretty cool.

My dad is still being lame about who I spend time with. I swear, if I wanted to spend a ton of time with other friends he wouldn't mind, but specific people...no way. "You can't live there all summer!" Gr. He's just jealous. Wait...I was going to tell James this revelation and I can't remember if I already did. Darn. Wait, yes I did. Anyway, so that's lame, because then I have to regulate how often I see certain pals.

I was on myspace (blegh) and I was looking at my pictures I'd posted a long time ago. It made me sad, because I was so much skinnier then, yet so incredibly insecure (you think now is bad). So now I'm not even near that skinny, yet I've gained confidence, but looking at old pictures makes my self-esteem plummet. Now I have to motivate myself to diet, which is incredibly annoying because I have no self-control.
Being female sucks sometimes. Guys can look like whatever they want and it doesn't matter, but girls, no. They have to be perfect and thin and wear makeup and crud like that. Pressure, pressure.

I think I'll just...go to bed. Seeing as its 11pm, that's a good idea.
Hey I sliced my hand open today while I was helping my sister move to her apartment. Darn couch. Ouch. [rhyme!] I'm pretty proud of it though- hooray for battle wounds.

Brownie points for whoever actually read through all of this. :) I appreciate you.